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When it comes to raising babies, some parents take a different approach while raising boys, and a different one for the girls. Haven’t you been to an all-boy or all-girl offspring homes? Ever noticed how their parents act differently with each of them?
You might love them both, but when it comes to rearing girls, you might go softer on them. You implicitly think and reflect in your actions that girls are pretty, delicate, and sensitive. You inadvertently develop a soft spot for them. Not that you won’t have the soft-heartedness for your son, but you will be less expressive of your emotions towards your boy. Here are some of the ways you might be parenting your son and daughter differently.
1. You are tough on your boy from the beginning.
You will train him to control crying and keep his voice down. But the same might not apply to your girl. It could be more pacifying or encouraging enough for your girl to break down just so often that she could turn out to be a party-pooper! It’s high time that we provide our sons with a safe space to express their feelings with no judgement.
2. You encourage your boy to be more manly.
Some cultures also demand that you make your boy manly because they ought to be so. It’s not just the way he dresses or how he carries himself. In reality, your little boy may go through emotional upheavals just like your little girl does, and it isn’t a good idea to make him bottle up his feelings. It’s good to unwind – if not with anyone, surely with the parents. You must also teach your son to be a good listener, be sensitive towards others needs, and be accommodative.
3. You might use words that are terribly gender-specific.
When you appreciate your young one, if you use words like ‘smart’ or ‘clever’ for your boy, but words like ‘beautiful,’ ‘pretty’ or ‘princess’ for your girl, it’s time to think it over. While you don’t want your boy to think that he is the ‘princess’ of the family, you don’t want your girl to think that she is a dud. Use words for appreciation wisely. ‘Smart’, ‘clever,’ ‘brilliant,’ ‘intelligent,’ ‘strong,’ ‘nice’ are some of the words that apply to both your son and daughter. You could use them interchangeably, use them to motivate them both alike and help them build their self-confidence.
4. You are more protective of your daughter than your son.
True, girls are physically not as strong as boys are. But, apart from physical strength, mental strength also matters. You must prepare them both for the challenges that they will face in the society going forward. They must be equipped to defend themselves amidst high school vagaries and the fierce competition as they grow up.
5. You might train your son on things that need initiative.
Just because men were once the sole breadwinners of their family doesn’t mean that your daughter must be left behind when it comes to learning crucial lessons while growing up. It’s needless to say that urban women share just as many responsibilities and can lead a family on par with her husband. So it’s important that you train them both equally well.
It’s important to get over the approach towards your boys or girls while raising children. Although you might not pay attention, if you could relate to the above points and attitude shift between your son and daughter, it might be good idea to take a new approach. Make sure you are raising them with equal parameters to ensure your pigeon pair turn out equals.
