When I got pregnant the first time around, I never imagined I’d be breastfeeding way beyond the first 6 months after my baby’s birth. Being a working mom, I planned to introduce the weaning process early on.
But since my now 2-year old and I bonded over it, we decided to continue it a little longer. Till I got pregnant again, that is.
We Really Bond Over Breastfeeding
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My girl is a real chatty Cathy! The moment we sit down for our daily nursing session, she starts talking about her day. Often she pauses in between breastfeeding to tell me about her adventures in the playground or what she’d like for lunch. After a point, I’ll ask her if she wants to stop now and grab a bite to eat or watch a movie together. But she’ll shake her little head no and continue enjoying our session.
Why I Continued Breastfeeding For So Long
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Like I said, I wasn’t planning to continue this long. I’d never thought I’d be breastfeeding while pregnant the second time. By the time my girl turned 1, we were on a good run. And when she crossed the 18-month mark, both of us still felt like we had a long way to go. And then she turned 2, and we were already onto breastfeeding for two years!
By this time, my husband and I were planning for a second child. But since my milk was still flowing when we were trying, I got pregnant while continuing to breastfeed my toddler.
However, things started going a little south during my first trimester. Breastfeeding hurt so bad that we almost rushed into the weaning process! The added nausea on top wasn’t helping at all.
Every time my girl latched on, my sensitive nipples would let out a scream (if they could). Many times, I had to tell my daughter to go easy on me. And while she obliged at first, she went back to her usual chatty self with a strong latch, not being able to comprehend that her little sibling in my tummy was the reason why her favorite time of the day now hurt.
But Now In The Second Trimester, I Can Feel The Milk Supply Reducing
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For a long time after my girl was born, I had to regularly wear nursing pads. Even right up till my second pregnancy. However, now as I entered my second trimester, I noticed that the need to use them was less. In fact, I didn’t feel as heavy as I used to either.
I’d ask my daughter if there was still milk, and she’d happily show me the creamy liquid in her mouth, indicating that she’s still quite content with how things are. That she still loves our little bonding time and feels secure, it’s not going anywhere.
But I’m not sure anymore how long I’ll be able to continue with this and if it’ll last the entire term of my pregnancy. Nursing now is getting exhausting. But we’re not stopping just yet. We’re taking each day as it comes.
My Little One Still Insists On Continuing Nursing
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As I step into my third trimester, things are certainly getting difficult. I try to tell my daughter that maybe it’s time for us to practice weaning full-on, cajoling her by telling her that we should save some milk for her younger sibling. But she just confidently smiles at me and says that they can share. At that point, I can’t help it. It’s sweet that she has it all figured out already!
Breastfeeding is now a very comforting and critical part of her daily routine. She’s always looked forward to it. It’s what she knows! And it feels damn difficult to get her off breast milk because I know both of us will feel the loss when the weaning is done. But I also know that we’ll bond in several new ways and that it’ll be okay in the end.
That said, I know it’ll leave her confused and sad. But I guess that’s just part of growing up, right? As much I love our nursing/bonding sessions, I know that I may not be able to continue for long as my body keeps sending signals to stop it. Today, it feels okay. Tomorrow I know I’ll be crying just as much as her.
For now, though, we’re continuing the nursing and having extensive conversations about weaning, so the transition doesn’t come as a shock to her. We’re gradually cutting down on nursing time, choosing just one side to snuggle up to, and replacing milk sessions with reading a book. Together we’re finding new ways to bond so that not much changes between us.
